第16章 Ways to Make People Like You(5)
You don’t feel like smiling? Then what? Two things. First，force yourself to smile. If you are alone， force yourself to whistleor hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy， and thatwill tend to make you happy. Here is the way the psychologist andphilosopher William James put it：“Action seems to follow feeling， but really action and feeling gotogether; and by regulating the action， which is under the moredirect control of the will， we can indirectly regulate the feeling，which is not.
“Thus the sovereign voluntary path to cheerfulness， if ourcheerfulness be lost， is to sit up cheerfully and to act and speak asif cheerfulness were already there…”
Every body in the world is seeking happiness—and there isone sure way to find it. That is by controlling your thoughts.
Happiness doesn’t depend on outward conditions. It depends oninner conditions.
It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or whatyou are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you thinkabout it. For example， two people may be in the same place， doingthe same thing; both may have about an equal amount of money andprestige—and yet one may be miserable and the other happy. Why?
Because of a different mental attitude. I have seen just as manyhappy faces among the poor peasants toiling with their primitivetools in the devastating heat of the tropics as I have seen in airconditioned offices in New York， Chicago or Los Angeles.
“There is nothing either good or bad，” said Shakespeare， “butthinking makes it so.”
Abe Lincoln once remarked that “most folks are about ashappy as they make up their minds to be.” He was right. I sawa vivid illustration of that truth as I was walking up the stairs ofthe Long Island Railroad station in New York. Directly in front of me thirty or forty crippled boys on canes and crutches werestruggling up the stairs. One boy had to be carried up. I wasastonished at their laughter and gaiety. I spoke about it to oneof. the men in charge of the boys. “Oh， yes，” he said， “when a boyrealizes that he is going to be a cripple for life， he is shocked atfirst; but after he gets over the shock， he usually resigns himselfto his fate and then becomes as happy as normal boys.”
I felt like taking my hat off to those boys. They taught me alesson I hope I shall never forget.
Peruse this bit of sage advice from the essayist and publisherElbert Hubbard—but remember， perusing it won’t do you anygood unless you apply it：Whenever you go out-of-doors， draw the chin in， carry thecrown of the head high， and fill the lungs to the utmost; drink inthe sunshine; greet your friends with a smile， and put soul intoevery handclasp. Do not fear being misunderstood and do notwaste a minute thinking about your enemies. Try to fix firmly inyour mind what you would like to do; and then， without veeringoff direction， you will move straight to the goal. Keep your mindon the great and splendid things you would like to do， and then，as the days go gliding away， you will find yourself unconsciouslyseizing upon the opportunities that are required for the fulfillmentof your desire， just as the coral insect takes from the runningtide the element it needs. Picture in your mind the able， earnest，useful person you desire to be， and the thought you hold is hourlytransforming you into that particular individual… Thought issupreme. Preserve a right mental attitude—the attitude of courage，frankness， and good cheer. To think rightly is to create. All thingscome through desire and every sincere prayer is answered. Webecome like that on which our hearts are fixed. Carry your chin inand the crown of your head high. We are gods in the chrysalis.
The ancient Chinese were a wise lot—wise in the ways of theworld; and they had a proverb that you and I ought to cut out andpaste inside our hats. It goes like this： “A man without a smilingface must not open a shop.”
Some years ago， a department store in New York City， inrecognition of the pressures its sales clerks were under during theChristmas rush， presented the readers of its advertisements withthe following homely philosophy：THE VALUE OF A SMILE AT CHRISTMASIt costs nothing， but creates much.
It enriches those who receive， without impoverishing those whogive.
It happens in a flash and the memory of it sometimes lasts forever，None are so rich they can get along without it， and none so poorbut are richer for its benefits.
It creates happiness in the home， fosters good will in a business，and is the countersign of friends.
It is rest to the weary， daylight to the discouraged， sunshine to thesad， and Nature’s best antidote fee trouble.
Yet it cannot be bought， begged， borrowed， or stolen， for it issomething that is no earthly good to anybody till it is given away.
And if in the last-minute rush of Christmas buying some of oursalespeople should be too tired to give you a smile， may we ask youto leave one of yours?
For nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none left to give！
PRINCIPLE 2：
Smile.
Chapter 6
If You Don’t Do This，You Are Headed for Trouble
Back in 1898， a tragic thing happened in Rockland County，New York. A child had died， and on this particular day theneighbors were preparing to go to the funeral. Jim Farley wentout to the barn to hitch up his horse. The ground was coveredwith snow， the air was cold and snappy; the horse hadn’t beenexercised for days; and as he was led out to the watering trough，he wheeled playfully， kicked both his heels high in the air， andkilled Jim Farley. So the little village of Stony Point had twofunerals that week instead of one.
Jim Farley left behind him a widow and three boys， and a fewhundred dollars in insurance.