第52章 番外

“……德国佬像挑拣烂苹果一样，把犹太裔和俄裔一个个从俘虏的队伍中挑出，他们的眼神冷得像看死人。好人彼得走了，谢苗也走了，我却没时间替他们感到哀伤，因为我们这些剩下的倒霉蛋，很快被赶羊似的赶进了锈迹斑斑的火车车厢。

车厢内十分拥挤，味道简直没法形容，汗臭、霉味，还有伤口的血腥味混在一起...简直令人窒息。随着列车的颠簸前行，我们就像罐头里的沙丁鱼，在车厢里相互挤压，几乎无法呼吸。

我还算幸运，位于车门边，生锈的车门铰链有一条缝，月光透过缝隙，照进车厢。我看着门缝里的月亮，想起农场后院那盏昏黄的路灯。我的家乡在密苏里州，那里有我母亲烤的苹果派，父亲酿的威士忌，还有我在农场里追逐日落的童年时光……

……火车停了下来，有人说我们被送到了捷克，至少不是奥斯维辛，门砰的一声被打开了，阳光刺得眼睛都睁不开。一群德国兵围上来，他们对我们又用枪托砸，又是拳打脚踢，把奄奄一息的我们赶下车。我当时走在下车队伍的最前面，还是免不了挨了一拳，打我那个德国佬看起来才十六、七岁，但是他下手是真狠……

……就在这时候，那个小姑娘出现了，她手里拿着水枪，对着人群冲水。殴打我们的德国兵终于走了，躲到水枪冲不到的地方。我们躲无可躲，一开始，我还以为她是故意羞辱我们，但当水流进嘴，我向上帝发誓，那是我这辈子喝过最甘甜、最美味的水……

……德国佬清点了一遍人数，好多人没挺住，死在了这列该死的火车上。那个小姑娘没离开，还扶着一个英国佬，那家伙在诺威尔被俘（译者：诺威尔位于阿登地区），腿上中了一枪。德国人把他拖出车厢时，他伤口感染发烧，一边流脓一边散发恶臭，身体软得像滩泥。一个德国兵厌恶得抬起枪，似乎打算杀掉他，小姑娘拦下了他，她简直就是天使。

她明明和别人一样，穿着德国佬的黑制服，但我怎么也讨厌不起来。后来，我们知道了她的名字，比安卡。她站在工厂入口旁边，和周围那些德国兵格格不入。他们是地狱里爬出来的魔鬼，随时会对我们拳打脚踢。但比安卡不一样，她笑得真美，我甚至觉得，她比教堂里挂的圣母像都好看。

靠近她的时候，她身上有一股淡淡的花香，像风铃草和郁金香的味道，我心里一动，想起了家乡田野上的野花。当处于生死未卜的时候，人总是特别脆弱。或许是看到我擦拭泪水，当我们要擦肩而过时，她对我说，（几天后，提起这个场面，比利开玩笑说那姑娘当时是在看他，虽然我们都知道她其实是在看着我，但这小插曲还是让我们在绝望中找到了片刻的轻松）用一口德味英语：‘嘿，欢迎来到沃尔夫冈兵工厂！别哭了，伙计们，你们的战争已经结束了。’……”

“The Krauts picked us Jews and Russkies out of the captive line like they were sorting bad apples， their eyes cold as ice. Old Pete was gone， Semyon too， and there wasn't a fucking moment to feel sorry 'bout 'em. We， the leftovers， were shoved into those rusty train boxcars like cattle.

Inside those fucking boxcars， man， it was a stinkin' mess! Sweat， mold， and the smell of open wounds mixed together like a bad batch of moonshine. The train shook and rattled， and we were jammed in there like sardines in a can， hardly able to draw a breath. What the fuck were we gonna do?

Lucky for me， I was near the door where a crack let in a little moonlight. Looking through that crack， I thought of the warm glow of the porch light back at the farm in Missouri. Mom's homemade apple pie， Dad's whiskey still， and chasing sunsets across the fields as a kid... Shit， that felt like a lifetime ago.

The train stopped， and word got around that we weren't in Auschwitz， thank God， but some Czech place instead. The doors flew open， and the sun hit us like a freight train. A pack of Jerries descended on us， beating and kicking us like we were nothin'. Half-dead， we stumbled out. I caught a punch from a kid who looked barely old enough to shave， but he sure packed a wallop.

And then， this little gal showed up， a squirt gun in her hand， spraying water all over. The Jerries backed off， not wanting to get wet. We thought she was mocking us at first， but when that water hit our lips， I swear， it was the sweetest nectar I'd ever tasted.

The Jerries counted us off， and it was clear many hadn't made the trip. This girl， Bianca， she stayed behind， helping a Limey who'd been shot up in Noroy or wherever. His leg was a fuckin' mess， infected， feverish， stinking like a dead dog. One Jerry raised his rifle to put him out of his misery， but Bianca stepped in， an angel in disguise.

Dressed like the rest of the Jerries， but there was somethin' about her that drew us in. We learned her name later. Bianca， she stood by the factory gate， out of place among those devilish soldiers. But she was different， her smile bright as the sun， prettier than any Madonna picture in the church.

As I walked past her， I caught a whiff of lilacs and tulips， remindin' me of the wildflowers back home. What the fuck was I doing here? When you're not sure if you'll see tomorrow， you get soft. Maybe she saw me wiping away a tear， and as we passed， she said to me， with a touch of that German accent，'Hey， Guys! Welcome to die Wolfgang Waffenfabrik! Don't cry， die war for you all is over.'“

——节选自《地狱中的天堂岛：盟军战俘回忆录》，作者：今天也要不做人