外贸英语函电(第二版)
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Part 2 Principles for Good Business Letter

Different with a private letter, a good business letter should have a definite subject, concise contents and completely easy-to-understand expressions. Generally speaking, there are 7C-principles you’d better learn by heart in writing a business letter.

2.1 Courtesy

It’s more important to show courtesy in all business activities, especially for one who tries to enter into a relationship with a new customer. The language you use should be polite and modest. Also replying timely is another polite manner. To show courtesy, one should follow closely and tactfully the following suggestions.

1) To be sincere polite and heartfelt respectful.

2) To be considerate understanding.

3) To avoid irritating, offensive or belittling statements. Reduce negative sentences, for negative tends to have negative consequences.

4) To reply in a prompt way. If you answer late, you should give a strong and understandable reason.

5) To be very careful when expressing regretful or upset words if it is absolutely necessary.

Please compare the following sentences, for “A” is better than “B”.

A. We have received with many thanks your letter of … and we take the pleasure of sending you our latest catalogue. We wish to draw your attention to a special offer.

B. You will be particularly interested in a special offer on page 5 of the latest catalog enclosed, which you requested in your letter of …

A. We are sorry not to make ourselves clear.

B. We are sorry you have misunderstood us.

A. If your price could be lower, we will bear it.

B. Your price is too high. We can’t bear it.

2.2 Consideration

To create a good impression, you should adjust your words according to the demands, interests, difficulties and other information of the other party. Try to put yourself in his or her place. To emphasize “you-attitude” rather than “we-attitude” is more respectful for each other.

When you are writing, you should not only know well his or her culture background, but also his or her position, whether he or she is a potential customer or an old customer. Then the proper languages will be used accordingly to create a harmonious atmosphere and achieve a best communication effect.

Please compare the following sentences, for “A” is better than “B”.

A. You will earn 2 percent discount if you pay in cash.

B. We will allow 2 percent discount for cash payment.

A. We will send you the latest brochure next month.

B. We won’t be able to send you the latest brochure this month.

2.3 Completeness

A business letter should cover every essential matter, such as invitation letter should state the time, place and so on, to avoid vague expressions. When you are writing, “5W1H” is always as an outline. And before sending out your letter, you’d better double check whether you answer is complete or not, whether the reasons are enough to support the fact, and who will receive the letter. Incompleteness will not only show your unprofessional work, but also lead to the recipient’s unfavorable impression to your firm. Sometimes it might hinder the trade procession.

2.4 Clearness

Clearness or clarity is an important criteria of a good business letter. A good letter should make readers understand fully at one glance without words or expressions to be misunderstood. So after determining what to write, you’d better carefully choose some straight-forward, familiar and colloquial words, to build simple and effective sentences and paragraphs to make your idea clear. Try to avoid vague and ambiguous words. If necessary, you can use some samples, illustrations, and other ways to help understanding visually. Please pay attention to some following suggestions.

1) To avoid misused words.

e.g. As to the steamers sailing from Hong Kong to San Francisco, we have bimonthly direct services.

The bimonthly means twice a month or once two monthes. So you should write more directly as “We have two direct sailings every month from Hong Kong to San Francisco.” or “We have semimonthly direct sailing from Hong Kong to San Francisco.” or “We have a direct sailing from Hong Kong to San Francisco.”

2) To note the word position.

e.g. “We shall be able to supply 10 cases of the item only.” may imply two items or above involved. So you should write “We shall be able to supply 10 cases only of the item.”

3) To note the sentence structure.

e.g. “We sent you 5 samples yesterday of the goods which you requested in your letter of May 20 by air.” is more difficult to read than “We sent you, by air, 5 samples of the goods which you requested in your letter of May 20.”

2.5 Conciseness

The conciseness means that you should not only to convey the expression meaning simply, but also not to sacrifice completeness or courtesy. A good business letter should be precise and to the point. When you are writing to achieve this goal, you should give up those old trade terms firstly. Then you should avoid wordy languages, delete those redundancy, repetition and excessive sentences, try to keep you message effective and concise. After that, the most important message would be presented to the reader. Please pay attention to the following guidelines.

1) To avoid multiple words.

① “We wish to acknowledge receipt of your letter...”could be revised as “We appreciate your letter...”

② “Enclosed herewith please find two copies of...” could be revised as “We enclose two copies of...”

2) To avoid unnecessary repetition.

3) To use short sentences and simple words. Please compare the following words, for the right side is better than the left.

2.6 Concreteness

Business letters must be written in vivid, clear and concrete language, and avoid vague, general and abstract words and statements. Especially for the letters calling for a specific reply, such as offers and trade terms etc., concreteness is always stressed. It’s a common way to use specific facts and figures, select vivid and image-building words and sentences. And it prefers active verbs to passive verbs.

For example, when you talk about time, it’s better to give specific time with day, month, year and even hour if necessary. We should avoid words like short or long when we describe the quality of a good. Exact figures and facts are better. Please compare the following sentences.

A. We will send the samples to you before Jun 6.

B. We will send the samples to you as soon as possible.

2.7 Correctness

Business letters must be written correctly because they could involve the rights, interests and obligations of both sides. In particular, business letters are usually regarded as proofs of commercial document. They are often taken as the base of all kinds of documents, such as commercial invoice, sales contracts.

A correct letter should be written in a proper form, not only showing the correct vocabulary and grammar, proper spelling and punctuation, but also presenting the correct descriptions, factual information, accurate data, standard writing form and exact trade terms. And obviously the latter will cost you more time to learn well.