第36章 [1728-1731](2)

One day, when I least expected it, I was sent for by the Count de la Roque.Having frequently called at his house, without being able to speak with him, I grew weary, and supposing he had either forgot me retained some unfavorable impression of me, returned no more: but Iwas mistaken in both these conjectures.He had more than once witnessed the pleasure I took in fulfilling my duty to his aunt: he had even mentioned it to her, and afterwards spoke of it, when I no longer thought of it myself.

He received me graciously, saying that instead of amusing me with useless promises, he had sought to place me to advantage; that he had succeeded, and would put me in a way to better my situation, but the rest must depend on myself.That the family into which he should introduce me being both powerful and esteemed, I should need no other patrons; and though at first on the footing of a servant, Imight be assured, that if my conduct and sentiments were found above that station, I should not long remain in it.The end of this discourse cruelly disappointed the brilliant hopes the beginning had inspired."What! forever a footman?" said I to myself, with a bitterness which confidence presently effaced, for I felt myself too superior to that situation to fear long remaining there.

He took me to the Count de Gauvon, Master of the Horse to the Queen, and Chief of the illustrious House of Solar.The air of dignity conspicuous in this respectable old man, rendered the affability with which he received me yet more interesting.He questioned me with evident interest, and I replied with sincerity.He then told the Count de la Roque, that my features were agreeable, and promised intellect, which he believed I was not deficient in; but that was not enough, and time must show the rest; after which, turning to me, he said, "Child, almost all situations are attended with difficulties in the beginning; yours, however, shall not have too great a portion of them; be prudent, and endeavor to please every one, that will be almost your only employment; for the rest fear nothing, you shall be taken care of." Immediately after he went to the Marchioness de Breil, his daughter-in-law, to whom he presented me, and then to the Abbe de Gauvon, his son.I was elated with this beginning, as I knew enough of the world already to conclude, that so much ceremony is not generally used at the reception of a footman.In fact, I was not treated like one.I dined at the steward's table; did not wear a livery; and the Count de Favria (a giddy youth) having commanded me to get behind his coach, his grandfather ordered that I should get behind no coach, nor follow any one out of the house.Meantime, I waited at table, and did, within doors, the business of a footman; but I did it, as it were, of my own free will, without being appointed to any particular service; and except writing some letters, which were dictated to me, and cutting out some ornaments for the Count de Favria, I was almost the absolute master of my time.This trial of my discretion, which I did not then perceive, was certainly very dangerous, and not very humane; for in this state of idleness I might have contracted vices which I should not otherwise have given in to.Fortunately, it did not produce that effect; my memory retained the lessons of M.Gaime, they had made an impression on my heart, and I sometimes escaped from the house of my patron to obtain a repetition of them.I believe those who saw me going out, apparently by stealth, had no conception of my business.

Nothing could be more prudent than the advice he gave me respecting my conduct.My beginning was admirable; so much attention, assiduity, and zeal, had charmed every one.The Abbe Gaime advised me to moderate this first ardor, lest I should relax, and that relaxation should be considered as neglect."Your setting out," said he, "is the rule of what will be expected of you; endeavor gradually to increase your attentions, but be cautious how you diminish them."As they paid but little attention to my trifling talents, and supposed I possessed no more than nature had given me, there was no appearance (notwithstanding the promises of Count de Gauvon) of my meeting with any particular consideration.Some objects of more consequence had intervened.The Marquis de Breil, son of the Count de Gauvon, was then ambassador at Vienna; some circumstances had occurred at that court which for some weeks kept the family in continual agitation, and left them no time to think of me.Meantime, Ihad relaxed but little in my attentions, though one object in the family did me both good and harm, making me more secure from exterior dissipation, but less attentive to my duty.