第216章

Now, these countries are different: they would do all that, if it were native.It is true they praise God, but that is merely a formality, and nothing in it; they open out their whole hearts to no foreigner.

The musical critics of the German press praise the Jubilees with great enthusiasm--acquired technique etc, included.

One of the jubilee men is a son of General Joe Johnson, and was educated by him after the war.The party came up to the house and we had a pleasant time.

This is paradise, here--but of course we have got to leave it by and by.

The 18th of August--[Anniversary of Susy Clemens's death.]--has come and gone, Joe--and we still seem to live.

With love from us all.

MARK.

Clemens declared he would as soon spend his life in Weggis "as anywhere else in the geography," but October found them in Vienna for the winter, at the Hotel Metropole.The Austrian capital was just then in a political turmoil, the character of which is hinted in the following:

To Rev.J.H.Twichell, in Hartford:

HOTEL METROPOLE, VIENNA, Oct.23, '97.

DEAR JOE,--We are gradually getting settled down and wonted.Vienna is not a cheap place to live in, but I have made one small arrangement which: has a distinctly economical aspect.The Vice Consul made the contract for me yesterday-to-wit: a barber is to come every morning 8.30and shave me and keep my hair trimmed for $2.50 a month.I used to pay $1.50 per shave in our house in Hartford.

Does it suggest to you reflections when you reflect that this is the most important event which has happened to me in ten days--unless I count--in my handing a cabman over to the police day before yesterday, with the proper formalities, and promised to appear in court when his case comes up.

If I had time to run around and talk, I would do it; for there is much politics agoing, and it would be interesting if a body could get the hang of it.It is Christian and Jew by the horns--the advantage with the superior man, as usual--the superior man being the Jew every time and in all countries.Land, Joe, what chance would the Christian have in a country where there were 3 Jews to 10 Christians! Oh, not the shade of a shadow of a chance.The difference between the brain of the average Christian and that of the average Jew--certainly in Europe--is about the difference between a tadpole's and an Archbishop's.It's a marvelous, race--by long odds the most marvelous that the world has produced, Isuppose.

And there's more politics--the clash between Czech and Austrian.I wish I could understand these quarrels, but of course I can't.

With the abounding love of us all MARK.

In Following the Equator there was used an amusing picture showing Mark Twain on his trip around the world.It was a trick photograph made from a picture of Mark Twain taken in a steamer-chair, cut out and combined with a dilapidated negro-cart drawn by a horse and an ox.In it Clemens appears to be sitting luxuriously in the end of the disreputable cart.His companions are two negroes.To the creator of this ingenious effect Mark Twain sent a characteristic acknowledgment.

To T.S.Frisbie VIENNA, Oct.25, '97.

MR.T.S.FRISBIE,--Dear Sir: The picture has reached me, and has moved me deeply.That was a steady, sympathetic and honorable team, and although it was not swift, and not showy, it pulled me around the globe successfully, and always attracted its proper share of attention, even in the midst of the most costly and fashionable turnouts.Princes and dukes and other experts were always enthused by the harness and could hardly keep from trying to buy it.The barouche does not look as fine, now, as it did earlier-but that was before the earthquake.

The portraits of myself and uncle and nephew are very good indeed, and your impressionist reproduction of the palace of the Governor General of India is accurate and full of tender feeling.

I consider that this picture is much more than a work of art.How much more, one cannot say with exactness, but I should think two-thirds more.

Very truly yours MARK TWAIN.

Following the Equator was issued by subscription through Mark Twain's old publishers, the Blisses, of Hartford.The sale of it was large, not only on account of the value of the book itself, but also because of the sympathy of the American people with Mark Twain's brave struggle to pay his debts.When the newspapers began to print exaggerated stories of the vast profits that were piling up, Bliss became worried, for he thought it would modify the sympathy.He cabled Clemens for a denial, with the following result:

To Frank E.Bliss, in Hartford:

VIENNA, Nov.4, 1897.

DEAR BLISS,--Your cablegram informing me that a report is in circulation which purports to come from me and which says I have recently made $82,000 and paid all my debts has just reached me, and I have cabled back my regret to you that it is not true.I wrote a letter--a private letter--a short time ago, in which I expressed the belief that I should be out of debt within the next twelvemonth.If you make as much as usual for me out of the book, that belief will crystallize into a fact, and Ishall be wholly out of debt.I am encoring you now.

It is out of that moderate letter that the Eighty-Two Thousand-Dollar mare's nest has developed.But why do you worry about the various reports? They do not worry me.They are not unfriendly, and I don't see how they can do any harm.Be patient; you have but a little while to wait; the possible reports are nearly all in.It has been reported that I was seriously ill--it was another man; dying--it was another man; dead --the other man again.It has been reported that I have received a legacy it was another man; that I am out of debt--it was another man; and now comes this $82,000--still another man.It has been reported that Iam writing books--for publication; I am not doing anything of the kind.