第181章
'Did anybody ever ask you?'
'What would you give to know? But I will tell you frankly;--yes. And once--once I thought that my answer would not have been a "no".'
'But you changed your mind?'
'When the moment came I could not bring myself to say the word that should rob me of my liberty for ever. I had said "no" to him often enough before--poor fellow; and on this occasion, he told me that he had asked me for the last time. "I shall not give myself another chance," he said, "for I shall be on board ship within a week." I merely bade him good-bye. It was the only answer I gave him. He understood me, and since that day his foot has not pressed his native soil.'
'And was it all because you are so fond of your liberty?' said Johnny.
'Perhaps--I did not--love him,' said Miss Demolines, thoughtfully. She was now again seated in her chair, and John Eames had gone back to his corner of the sofa. 'If I had really loved him, I suppose it would have been otherwise. He was a gallant fellow, and had two thousand a year of his own, in India stock and other securities.'
'Dear me! And he has not married yet?'
'He wrote me a word to say that he would never marry till I was married--but that on the day that he should hear of my wedding, he would go to the first single woman near him and propose. It was a droll thing to say; was it not?'
'The single woman ought to feel herself flattered.'
'He would find plenty to accept him. Besides being so well off he was a very handsome fellow, and is connected with people of title. He had everything to recommend him.'
'And yet you refused him?'
'Yes. You think I was foolish;--do you not?'
'I don't think you were foolish if you didn't care for him.'
'It was my destiny, I suppose; I daresay I was wrong. Other girls marry without violent love, and do very well afterwards. Look at Maria Clutterbuck.'
The name of Maria Clutterbuck had become odious to John Eames. As long as Miss Demolines would continue to talk about herself he could listen with some amount of gratification. Conversation on that subject was the natural progress of the Bayswater romance. And if Madalina would only call her friend by her present name, he had no strong objection to an occasional mention of the lady; but the combined names of Maria Clutterbuck had come to be absolutely distasteful to him. He did not believe in the Maria Clutterbuck friendship--either in its past or present existence, as described by Madalina. Indeed, he did not put strong faith in anything that Madalina said to him. In the handsome gentleman with two thousand a year, he did not believe at all. But the handsome gentleman had only been mentioned once in the course of his acquaintance with Miss Demolines, whereas Maria Clutterbuck had come up so often! 'Upon my word I must wish you good-bye,' he said. 'It is going for eleven o'clock, and I have to start tomorrow at seven.'
'What difference does that make?'
'A fellow wants to get a little sleep, you know.'
'Go, then;--go and get your sleep. What a sleepy-head generation it is.' Johnny longed to ask whether the last generation was less sleepy-headed, and whether the gentleman with two thousand a year sat up talking all night before he pressed his foot for the last time on his native soil; but he did not dare. As he said to himself afterwards, 'It would not do to bring the Bayswater romance too suddenly to termination!' 'But before you go,' she continued, 'I must say the word to you about that picture. Did you speak to Mr Dalrymple?'
'I did not. I have been so busy with different things that I have not seen him.'
'And now you are going?'
'Well--to tell the truth, I think I shall see him tonight, in spite of my being so sleepy-headed. I wrote him a line that I would look in and smoke a cigar with him if he chanced to be at home!'