第69章 CHAPTER XIX The Warden Resigns(2)
'Susan，' said he， 'my mind on this subject is made up； it is not without much repugnance that I act in opposition to the advice of such men as Sir Abraham Haphazard and the archdeacon； but in this matter I can take no advice， I cannot alter the resolution to which I have come.'
'But two days， papa--'
'No--nor can I delay it. You may add to my present unhappiness by pressing me， but you cannot change my purpose； it will be a comfort to me if you will let the matter rest'： and， dipping his pen into the inkstand， he fixed his eyes intently on the paper.
There was something in his manner which taught his daughter to perceive that he was in earnest； she had at one time ruled supreme in her father's house， but she knew that there were moments when， mild and meek as he was， he would have his way， and the present was an occasion of the sort.
She returned， therefore， to her knitting， and very shortly after left the room.
The warden was now at liberty to compose his letter， and， as it was characteristic of the man， it shall be given at full length. The official letter， which， when written， seemed to him to be too formally cold to be sent alone to so dear a friend， was accompanied by a private note； and both are here inserted.
The letter of resignation ran as follows：
'第一章CHAPTER HOTEL， ST. PAUL'S， LONDON， 'August， 18--'My LORD BISHOP， 'It is with the greatest pain that I feel myself constrained to resign into your Lordship's hands the wardenship of the hospital at Barchester， which you so kindly conferred upon me， now nearly twelve years since.
'I need not explain the circumstances which have made this step appear necessary to me. You are aware that a question has arisen as to the right of the warden to the income which has been allotted to the wardenship； it has seemed to me that this right is not well made out， and I hesitate to incur the risk of taking an income to which my legal claim appears doubtful.
'The office of precentor of the cathedral is， as your Lordship is aware， joined to that of the warden； that is to say， the precentor has for many years been the warden of the hospital； there is， however， nothing to make the junction of the two offices necessary， and， unless you or the dean and chapter object to such an arrangement， I would wish to keep the precentorship. The income of this office will now be necessary to me； indeed， I do not know why I should be ashamed to say that I should have difficulty in supporting myself without it.
'Your Lordship， and such others as you may please to consult on the matter， will at once see that my resignation of the wardenship need offer not the slightest bar to its occupation by another person. I am thought in the wrong by all those whom I have consulted in the matter； I have very little but an inward and an unguided conviction of my own to bring me to this step， and I shall， indeed， be hurt to find that any slur is thrown on the preferment which your kindness bestowed on me， by my resignation of it. I， at any rate for one， shall look on any successor whom you may appoint as enjoying a clerical situation of the highest respectability， and one to which your Lordship's nomination gives an indefeasible right.
'I cannot finish this official letter without again thanking your Lordship for all your great kindness， and I beg to subscribe myself- -Your Lordship's most obedient servant 'SEPTIMUS HARDING， 'Warden of Barchester Hospital， and Precentor of the Cathedral.'
He then wrote the following private note：
'My DEAR BISHOP， 'I cannot send you the accompanying official letter without a warmer expression of thanks for all your kindness than would befit a document which may to a certain degree be made public. You， I know， will understand the feeling， and， perhaps， pity the weakness which makes me resign the hospital. I am not made of calibre strong enough to withstand public attack. Were I convinced that I stood on ground perfectly firm， that I was certainly justified in taking eight hundred a year under Hiram's will， I should feel bound by duty to retain the position， however unendurable might be the nature of the assault； but， as I do not feel this conviction， I cannot believe that you will think me wrong in what I am doing.
'I had at one time an idea of keeping only some moderate portion of the income； perhaps three hundred a year， and of remitting the remainder to the trustees； but it occurred to me， and I think with reason， that by so doing I should place my successors in an invidious position， and greatly damage your patronage.
'My dear friend， let me have a line from you to say that you do not blame me for what I am doing， and that the officiating vicar of Crabtree Parva will be the same to you as the warden of the hospital.
'I am very anxious about the precentorship： the archdeacon thinks it must go with the wardenship； I think not， and， that， having it， I cannot be ousted. I will， however， be guided by you and the dean. No other duty will suit me so well， or come so much within my power of adequate performance.
'I thank you from my heart for the preferment which I am now giving up， and for all your kindness， and am， dear bishop， now as always-- Yours most sincerely， 'SEPTIMUS HARDING 'LONDON， - AUGUST， 18--'
Having written these letters and made a copy of the former one for the benefit of the archdeacon， Mr Harding， whom we must now cease to call the warden， he having designated himself so for the last time， found that it was nearly two o'clock， and that he must prepare for his journey. Yes， from this time he never again admitted the name by which he had been so familiarly known， and in which， to tell the truth， he had rejoiced. The love of titles is common to all men， and a vicar or fellow is as pleased at becoming Mr Archdeacon or Mr Provost， as a lieutenant at getting his captaincy， or a city tallow-chandler in becoming Sir John on the occasion of a Queen's visit to a new bridge. But warden he was no longer， and the name of precentor， though the office was to him so dear， confers in itself no sufficient distinction； our friend， therefore， again became Mr Harding.