第69章 LETTER LI(2)
Michel,St.Louis,and St.Lazare,in France etc.,are of a very different nature and were either the invitations to,or the rewards of;brave actions in fair war;and are now rather the decorations of the favor of the prince,than the proofs of the merit of the subject.
However,they are worth your inquiries to a certain degree,and conversation will give you frequent opportunities for them.Wherever you are,I would advise you to inquire into the respective orders of that country,and to write down a short account of them.For example,while you are in Saxony,get an account of l'Aigle Blanc and of what other orders there may be,either Polish or Saxon;and,when you shall be at Berlin,inform yourself of three orders,l'Aigle Noir,la Generosite et le Vrai Merite,which are the only ones that I know of there.But whenever you meet with straggling ribands and stars,as you will with a thousand in Germany,do ,not fail to inquire what they are,and to take a minute of them in your memorandum book;for it is a sort of knowledge that costs little to acquire,and yet it is of some use.Young people have frequently an incuriousness about them,arising either from laziness,or a contempt of the object,which deprives them of several such little parts of knowledge,that they afterward wish they had acquired.If you will put conversation to profit,great knowledge may be gained by it;and is it not better (since it is full as easy)to turn it upon useful than upon useless subjects?People always talk best upon what they know most,and it is both pleasing them and improving one's self,to put them upon that subject.With people of a particular profession,or of a distinguished eminency in any branch of learning,one is not at a loss;but with those,whether men or women,who properly constitute what is called the beau monde,one must not choose deep subjects,nor hope to get any knowledge above that of orders,ranks,families,and court anecdotes;which are therefore the proper (and not altogether useless)subjects of that kind of conversation.Women,especially,are to be talked to as below men and above children.If you talk to them too deep,you only confound them,and lose your own labor;if you talk to them too frivolously,they perceive and resent the contempt.The proper tone for them is,what the French call the 'Entregent',and is,in truth,the polite jargon of good company.Thus,if you are a good chemist,you may extract something out of everything.
A propos of the beau monde,I must again and again recommend the Graces to you:There is no doing without them in that world;and,to make a good figure in that world,is a great step toward making one in the world of business,particularly that part of it for which you are destined.An ungraceful manner of speaking,awkward motions,and a disagreeable address,are great clogs to the ablest man of business,as the opposite qualifications are of infinite advantage to him.I am told there is a very good dancing-master at Leipsig.I would have you dance a minuet very well,not so much for the sake of the minuet itself (though that,if danced at all,ought to be danced,well),as that it will give you a habitual genteel carriage and manner of presenting yourself.
Since I am upon little things,I must mention another,which,though little enough in itself,yet as it occurs at,least once in every day,deserves some attention;I mean Carving.Do you use yourself to carve ADROITLY and genteelly,without hacking half an hour across a bone;without bespattering the company with the sauce;and without overturning the glasses into your neighbor's pockets?These awkwardnesses are extremely disagreeable;and,if often repeated,bring ridicule.They are very easily avoided by a little attention and use.
How trifling soever these things may seem,or really be in themselves,they are no longer so when above half the world thinks them otherwise.
And,as I would have you 'omnibus ornatum--excellere rebus',I think nothing above or below my pointing out to you,or your excelling in.
You have the means of doing it,and time before you to make use of them.
Take my word for it,I ask nothing now but what you will,twenty years hence,most heartily wish that you had done.Attention to all these things,for the next two or three years,will save you infinite trouble and endless regrets hereafter.May you,in the whole course of your life,have no reason for any one just regret!Adieu.
Your Dresden china is arrived,and I have sent it to your Mamma.