第28章 Chirp the Third(8)
'And could you steal, disguised, into the house of your oldfriend?' rejoined the Carrier.'There was a frank boy once - howmany years is it, Caleb, since we heard that he was dead, and hadit proved, we thought? - who never would have done that.'
'There was a generous friend of mine, once; more a father to methan a friend;' said Edward, 'who never would have judged me, orany other man, unheard.You were he.So I am certain you willhear me now.'
The Carrier, with a troubled glance at Dot, who still kept far awayfrom him, replied, 'Well! that's but fair.I will.'
'You must know that when I left here, a boy,' said Edward, 'I wasin love, and my love was returned.She was a very young girl, whoperhaps (you may tell me) didn't know her own mind.But I knewmine, and I had a passion for her.'
'You had!' exclaimed the Carrier.'You!'
'Indeed I had,' returned the other.'And she returned it.I haveever since believed she did, and now I am sure she did.'
'Heaven help me!' said the Carrier.'This is worse than all.'
'Constant to her,' said Edward, 'and returning, full of hope, aftermany hardships and perils, to redeem my part of our old contract, Iheard, twenty miles away, that she was false to me; that she hadforgotten me; and had bestowed herself upon another and a richerman.I had no mind to reproach her; but I wished to see her, andto prove beyond dispute that this was true.I hoped she might havebeen forced into it, against her own desire and recollection.Itwould be small comfort, but it would be some, I thought, and on Icame.That I might have the truth, the real truth; observingfreely for myself, and judging for myself, without obstruction onthe one hand, or presenting my own influence (if I had any) beforeher, on the other; I dressed myself unlike myself - you know how;and waited on the road - you know where.You had no suspicion ofme; neither had - had she,' pointing to Dot, 'until I whispered inher ear at that fireside, and she so nearly betrayed me.'
'But when she knew that Edward was alive, and had come back,'
sobbed Dot, now speaking for herself, as she had burned to do, allthrough this narrative; 'and when she knew his purpose, she advisedhim by all means to keep his secret close; for his old friend JohnPeerybingle was much too open in his nature, and too clumsy in allartifice - being a clumsy man in general,' said Dot, half laughingand half crying - 'to keep it for him.And when she - that's me,John,' sobbed the little woman - 'told him all, and how hissweetheart had believed him to be dead; and how she had at lastbeen over-persuaded by her mother into a marriage which the silly,dear old thing called advantageous; and when she - that's me again,John - told him they were not yet married (though close upon it),and that it would be nothing but a sacrifice if it went on, forthere was no love on her side; and when he went nearly mad with joyto hear it; then she - that's me again - said she would go betweenthem, as she had often done before in old times, John, and wouldsound his sweetheart and be sure that what she - me again, John -said and thought was right.And it was right, John! And they werebrought together, John! And they were married, John, an hour ago!
And here's the Bride! And Gruff and Tackleton may die a bachelor!
And I'm a happy little woman, May, God bless you!'
She was an irresistible little woman, if that be anything to thepurpose; and never so completely irresistible as in her presenttransports.There never were congratulations so endearing anddelicious, as those she lavished on herself and on the Bride.
Amid the tumult of emotions in his breast, the honest Carrier hadstood, confounded.Flying, now, towards her, Dot stretched out herhand to stop him, and retreated as before.
'No, John, no! Hear all! Don't love me any more, John, tillyou've heard every word I have to say.It was wrong to have asecret from you, John.I'm very sorry I didn't think it any harm,till I came and sat down by you on the little stool last night.
But when I knew by what was written in your face, that you had seenme walking in the gallery with Edward, and when I knew what youthought, I felt how giddy and how wrong it was.But oh, dear John,how could you, could you, think so!'
Little woman, how she sobbed again! John Peerybingle would havecaught her in his arms.But no; she wouldn't let him.
'Don't love me yet, please, John! Not for a long time yet! When Iwas sad about this intended marriage, dear, it was because Iremembered May and Edward such young lovers; and knew that herheart was far away from Tackleton.You believe that, now.Don'tyou, John?'
John was going to make another rush at this appeal; but she stoppedhim again.
'No; keep there, please, John! When I laugh at you, as I sometimesdo, John, and call you clumsy and a dear old goose, and names ofthat sort, it's because I love you, John, so well, and take suchpleasure in your ways, and wouldn't see you altered in the leastrespect to have you made a King to-morrow.'
'Hooroar!' said Caleb with unusual vigour.'My opinion!'
'And when I speak of people being middle-aged, and steady, John,and pretend that we are a humdrum couple, going on in a jog-trotsort of way, it's only because I'm such a silly little thing, John,that I like, sometimes, to act a kind of Play with Baby, and allthat: and make believe.'
She saw that he was coming; and stopped him again.But she wasvery nearly too late.
'No, don't love me for another minute or two, if you please, John!