第7章 爱，永远禁不起等待 (6)

15. “By the way，” he called to me as I hesitated in his doorway，“did anyone ever tell you that Joanna is a good Hebrew18 name？”

16. Sixteen years have passed since the rabbi married David and me on a rainy October morning. And， yes， I have called out several times when I sensed we were in danger. I would tell the rabbi how well his analogy19 has served me， but I cannot. He died two years after our wedding. But I will always be grateful for the priceless gift he gave me： the wisdom to know that all of our experiences in life make us not less valuable， but more valuable， not less able to love， but more able to love.

1. 微尘在射进拉比办公室的那缕阳光中飞舞着，那缕阳光是拉比办公室里惟一的光源。拉比坐在椅子上往后仰，抚摸着他的胡须叹息了一声。他摘下金属丝镜架的眼镜，漫不经心地在他的法兰绒衬衫上擦拭着。

2. “这么说，”他开了口，“你离婚了。现在你想与这位犹太好小伙子结婚，有什么问题？”

3. 他用手把住他那有花白胡须的下巴，温柔地冲我微笑着。

4. 我真想尖叫。有什么问题？首先，我是基督教徒。第二，我比他年龄大。第三，这绝不是最不重要的——我离过婚！但我没有叫，而是迎向他那双温柔的棕色的眼睛，努力组织着话语。

5. “您不认为，”我结结巴巴地说，“离过婚就像东西被用过一样吗？就像是受损的物品吗？”

6. 他坐在椅子上，头往后靠，伸直了腿，将目光投向天花板。他轻捋着他那稀稀拉拉的、遮盖了下巴和脖子的胡须，然后他将身子转回办公桌前并朝我这边俯过来。

7. “比如说你得做个手术。有两位医生可供你选择。你会选谁？选位刚从医学院毕业的，还是选那位有经验的？”

8. “有经验的那位，”我回答。

9. 他笑了，脸上都是皱纹。“我也是，”他凝视着我说。“那么在这桩婚姻中，你就是有经验的一方。要知道这并不是什么坏事。”

10. “婚姻往往像在水上漂流，会陷入危险的激流里，会偏离航向流向暗藏的沙洲。等注意到时已经晚了。在你的脸上，我看到了一桩失败婚姻留下的痛苦。在这桩婚姻中你会注意到流向。当你看到岩石时你会大喊一声，你会呼叫要小心些，注意点。你将是有经验的那个人，”他叹息着说，“相信我，那并不是什么坏事，真地不是。”

11. 他走到窗边，透过百叶板向外瞥了一眼。“你瞧，这里没有人知道我的第一位妻子。我并没有掩藏，但我也没有大肆渲染。我们结婚没多久她就去世了，后来我迁居到这里。现在，夜深人静时我想到所有那些我从未能说出的话，我想到所有那些我在第一次婚姻中错过的机会。我相信对于我现在的妻子我是个更好的丈夫，是因为那位我失去的女人。”

12. 他眼里的悲伤显露出了含义。现在我明白了为什么我选择来和这个人谈婚姻，而没有图省事去找不属于我们双方宗教的人为我们主持婚礼。“拉比”一词意味着老师。不知怎的，我感觉出他会教给我，甚至会给予我去再次尝试、再次结婚、再次奉献出爱情所需要的勇气。

13. “我会为你和你的戴维主持婚礼，”拉比说，“但条件是，你要答应我，当你发现婚姻陷入危机时你要大声说出来。”

14. 我答应他我会的，然后我起身离开。

15. “顺便说一句，”当我走到门口犹豫片刻时他叫住我，“有没有人告诉过你乔安娜是个好的希伯来语名字？”

16. 10月一个下雨的早晨，拉比为我和戴维举行了婚礼。一晃16年过去了。是的，有几次当我感觉到我们身陷危机时我就大声地说了出来。我多想告诉拉比他的比喻让我多么受益。但是我无法告诉他。我们结婚两年后他就去世了。但是我永远感激他赐予我的无价的礼物：一种智慧，它使我懂得我们生活中所有的经历并不会使我们贬值，而是使我们更有价值，并不会使我们丧失爱的能力，而是使我们更有能力去爱。

Who Is Packing Our Spiritual Parachute？ 谁为我们准备心灵降落伞

1. Charles “Chuck” Plumb was a U.S. Navy jet pilot in Vietnam. After 75 combat missions， his plane was destroyed by a surface-to-air missile. Plumb ejected and parachuted into enemy hands. He was captured and spent six years in a communist Vietnamese prison. He survived the ordeal and now lectures on the lessons he learned from that experience.

2. One day， when Plumb and his wife were sitting in a restaurant， a man at another table came up and said， “You’re Plumb！ You flew jet fighters in Vietnam from the Aircraft Carrier Kitty Hawk. You were shutdown！”

3. “How in the world did you know that？” asked Plumb. “I packed your parachute，”the man replied. Plumb gasped in surprise and gratitude. The man pumped his hand and said， “I guess it worked！” Plumb assured him， “It sure did. If your chute hadn’t worked， I wouldn’t be here today.”

4. Plumb couldn’t sleep that night， thinking about that man. Plumb says， “I kept wondering what he might have looked like in a Navy uniform： a white hat， a bib in the back， and bell-bottom trousers. I wonder how many times I might have seen him and not even said， ‘Good morning， how are you？’ or anything because， you see， I was a fighter pilot and he was just a sailor.” Plumb thought of the many hours the sailor had spent on a long wooden table in the bowels of the ship， carefully weaving the shrouds and folding the silks of each chute， holding in his hands each time the fate of someone he didn’t know.

5. Now， Plumb asks his audience， “Who’s packing your parachute？” Everyone has someone who provides what they need to make it through the day. Plumb also points out that he needed many kinds of parachutes when his plane was shot down over enemy territory—he needed his physical parachute， his mental parachute， his emotional parachute， and his spiritual parachute. He called on all these supports before reaching safety.

6. Sometimes in the daily challenges that life gives us， we miss what is really important. We may fail to say hello， please， or thank you， to congratulate people on something wonderful that has happened to them， to give a compliment， or just to do something nice for no reason. As you go through this week， this month， and this year， recognizes people who pack your parachutes and send them your gratitude.

1. 查尔斯？恰克？帕朗柏是越战中美国海军的一位喷射机驾驶员。在完成了七十五次战役任务后，他的飞机被一枚地对空飞弹击毁，帕朗柏跳伞逃命，却降落在敌方阵营里，他被越共俘虏并被关在监狱里六个月，之后，他从这场苦难中成功逃生。现在，他为人们演讲有关他从经历中所学到的功课。

2. 有一天，当帕朗柏和妻子在一家餐厅用餐时，隔壁桌一位先生走过来说道：“你是帕朗柏！在越战中，你驾驶从小鹰号航空母舰上起飞的喷射战机，当时你的战机被飞弹打下来了！”

3. 帕朗柏问：“你怎么知道这件事的？”这位先生回答：“你的降落伞是我负责打包整理的。”帕朗柏惊讶地倒抽了一口气，立即向他表示谢意。这位先生使劲地握着帕朗柏的手说：“我想那个降落伞确实发挥了功效！”帕朗柏向他确认道：“它的确发挥了功效，否则我今天就不会在这里了。”

4. 那一晚帕朗柏无法入睡，心中一直想着那位先生。帕朗柏说：“我一直在想，当他穿着海军制服——戴着白帽、穿着工作背心和喇叭裤时，会是什么模样呢？有多少次当我看到他时，可能连一句‘早安，你好吗？’之类打招呼的话都没有说，因为我是战机驾驶，而他只是一位水手而已。”帕朗柏想到那位水手在船内的长木桌上，花了无数个小时，小心翼翼地整理着吊伞索，并一一迭好每个降落伞，每一次他的手里都掌握着某个他不认识的人的命运。

5. 现在，帕朗柏总会问着听众：“是谁帮你们打包降落伞呢？我们每个人的降落伞都是由别人供应的，而为了打包这些降落伞，他们可能必需工作一整天。”帕朗柏也指出当他的飞机在敌人领空被打下来时，他需要各种不同的降落伞：物质的降落伞、精神的降落伞、情感的降落伞和心灵的降落伞，在安全抵达地面之前，他需要这些降落伞的支持。

6. 我们每天面临生活中的挑战，有时候会遗漏了一些真正重要的事情。对于周遭的人，我们可能会忘了向他们打声招呼、说个请字或表达谢意，或是当某个人遇到好事时，忘了祝贺他、讲些赞美的话，或是单纯地做一些表达善意的行动。每当你过了一段时间后，也许是这个星期、这个月或今年时，请试着找出那些帮你打包‘降落伞’的人，并向他们致上谢意。

No Charge分文不收

1. Our little boy came up to his mother in the kitchen one evening while she was fixing supper，and handed her a piece of paper that he had been writing on. After his mom dried her hands on an apron，she read it，and this is what it said：